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Wednesday, January 8, 2014
For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality.
I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.
When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Manydeveloped illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way,you win.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness
When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Manydeveloped illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way,you win.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness
In August last year an astonishing video appeared on YouTube. During the 1:31 minute clip you can see paranormal activity that can truly send chills down your spine.
The video features a ghost that resides in a family crypt in Sofia, Bulgaria, Eastern Europe. The Sarafovi family consisted of 9 members who all died mysteriously in a fire more than a century ago. The youngest family member was a 4-year-old child and the oldest was a 64-year-old man. There is no information whether the fire was set on purpose or was just an accident as the tragedy took place back in 1912.
The clip was shot with an infrared camera by a person named Natalia Permanova. The ghost seen in the footage resembles a human figure that moves eerily slow. It even looks as if the ghost was slow dancing with someone.
The crypt depicted in the video resembles in architecture the other 30 crypts found in the cemetery at the time but there are many small details which make it unique and distinguishable.
The crypt depicted in the video resembles in architecture the other 30 crypts found in the cemetery at the time but there are many small details which make it unique and distinguishable.
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
The legend of the great “City of Atlantis” has intrigued explorers, thrill seekers and archeologists for decades, spawning several discoveries of real-life ancient underwater empires tucked among the sea’s sandy depths for centuries. Here are 7 mystical underwater archeological digs from around the world.
Heracleion, Egypt
It’s still unclear how this great Egyptian City found it’s resting place at the bottom of the great blue sea, but this year, marine archeologists have some well-preserved treasures to share with the world since the initial excavation. Sculptures, giant tablets inscribed in ancient Egyptian and Greek and sarcophagi will help banish myth and bring to light the history of this once prosperous city port.
Pavlopetri Peloponnese, Greece
The earliest underwater ruins to ever be discovered, this town covers 300m by 150m of the ocean floor, boasting intact street layouts, courtyards, tombs and buildings. An earthquake was the usual suspect that brought it 6 feet under…literally.
Yonaguni Jima, Japan
Yup, you guessed it- an earthquake rattled this “Japanese Atlantis” about 2,000 years ago and fed it to an angry sea. A local diver first noticed the ruins in 1986, which includes several stone structures and what many believe to be a monolithic pyramid.
Cleopatra’s Palace, Egypt
Legend has it that to avoid capture by the Romans, Cleopatra and Marc Anthony committed suicide together and the Romans, in turn, destroyed their belongings. Could that mean banishing them to the salty depths of the Mediterranean? Three areas have been discovered that may hold their watery tomb.
Kwan Phayao, Thailand
If you dive to the bottom of Lake Phayao you might find yourself sitting atop a 500-year-old Thai temple. Did I mention this lake is a man made, constructed about 70 years ago? Very interesting indeed.
Mahabalipuram, India
The temples of this age old Indian city were once the stuff of myth and legend, a tale of a flourishing sea port peppered with beautiful temples, flushed into the sea never to be found. But, it is believed that they have been found- thanks to the Indian Ocean tsunami back in 2004. archeologists are digging up some interesting 6ft tall stone structures, covered in intricate and elaborate carvings dating back to 7th century AD.
Heracleion, Egypt
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Pavlopetri Peloponnese, Greece
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Yonaguni Jima, Japan
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Cleopatra’s Palace, Egypt
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Kwan Phayao, Thailand
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Mahabalipuram, India
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Several black chicken breeds exist especially in Asia but the Chinese Silkie is the most popular. Silkies are attractive birds that are covered in silk like fluffy plumage. Underneath all that beauty however, the chicken’s skin and internal organs are all completely black. They are mostly sold in the western world as ornaments, but in China the Silkies are considered a delicacy. They are savored for their deep gammy flavor and are rarely roasted. They are also considered good moms since they can hatch other bird’s eggs.
The Chinese refer to them as the “black-boned chicken” or “wu gu ji” and have been using its medicinal value since the seventh or eighth century. Women use it to boost their energy after giving birth and it also has a positive effect on lungs, stomach, yin and blood when consumed. The Chinese take full advantage of the Silkies medicinal value by using it to make an amber colored soup that is mixed with dried wolf berries, ginseng and jujubes.
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You may be surprised to find out that there is a network of secret underground buildings all around the globe that were made to protect leaders and people in authority in cases of all kinds of threat. Most of these building remain unseen for decades. One such underground city in England has been revealed to the public in 2004. It was built in the 1950s and it had the capacity to shelter 4000 governmental employees in case of nuclear attacks.
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The complex underground facility, known as the Burlington Bunker, had 60 miles of roadways, laundries, kitchens and even a lake that should provide fresh water to its inhabitants. There were railways for the transportation of the Royal Family. The secret city was completed with a pub and a special tele communication hub, so that the prime minister could address the nation is case of an attack.
The bunker had the capacity to provide everything necessary to the inhabitants for a period of 3 months. It was constructed to withstand various kinds of attacks.
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